Through a stained glass window

One of the hardest things for me, as a follower of Jesus the Christ is
to be transparent. My natural, default setting is put up walls. I
worked hard my whole life at keeping people out, or at the very least
at a safe distance.

I juxtaposed this with my verbal proclaimation that I was in fact a
Christ follower. I kept everything in darkness even though Christ
compells us to the light.

I became adept at superficial forms of intimacy, I knew how to care
deeply for others but often refused them that same privilege.
Relationally I could and often was described as emotionally
unavailable. I would deny people transparency and justify it by saying
I'm merely comfortable with silence.

Then Jesus came along and wrecked everything.

He knocked over my house of cards with a simple question.

If you don't let people see you, how will they see me?

And with that the cards began to flutter to the floor.

Now the cool thing about Jesus is, he doesn't destroy our paradigms
and leave us with nothing, instead he restores them.

You see, if you were to spend your whole life, all your savings, sold
everything you had to build an art gallery and bring in exquisite and
beautiful prices. Would you then spend as much effort as possible
boarding up windows and bricking the door shut, and continue to tell
people about your wonderful gallery?

Sometimes this is what we do with Jesus. We keep him inside our/my
bricked up houses with stainglass windows(see how I tied that in
there, pretty clever) that may look really good, but no one knows
what's going on inside.

Jesus showed me that's what I was doing. He also reccommeded that I
stop. I figured what the heck, I'm not the carpenter here.

Matthew 5:14

14"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be
hidden. 15Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.
Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in
the house. 16In the same way, let your light shine before men, that
they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven

Sent from my iPhone

How are you?

A common enough phrase is it not. In fact if I were a betting man, i would suspect that 93.827 of all conversations begin with some form of this inquiry. These oft understated words are actually farore significant perhaps than we realize.
It is in the moments immeaditely following these words that define not only the rest of the conversation but also reveals several other things as well.
For instance during those few seconds we quickly evaluate several things, such as:

How honest do I feel like being?

Do I trust them?

Do I even like them?

Do they still smell funny?

Do they really want to know?

How we respond defines our transparency for the rest of the conversation. Many of us deflect (guilty) we respond sometimes curtly and almost always briely with a word or two.

I'm fine. Or everythings great.

I know I do this all the time. Sometimes we even need to do it, certain situations dictate us to limit our transparency. Many times however I do it to keep people away. God on his never leaving, never forsaking kind if way reminds me, showse that transparency is critical to my faith. The Holy Spirit often needs to push me reminding my life is God's andy grasp on it has been forefit since the cross.

Galatians 6.2 We are exhorted to help bear each others burdens.

In our culture autonomy(a fancy way of saying our desire to do things our own way and not to be confused with anatomy) is incredibly important. We value independance, it is seen as being strong, While asking for help is a sign of weakness.

This is not the way Jesus had planned for us. It's a tactic of the enemy, to separate us from the body of Christ, convincing us we would fare better on our own, that no one would understand, or that some how the loads we carry are toxic and we had better keep it inside less we infect others as well.

God continues to challenge me in this way and i find it quite scary. But it is something I need to do and fortunately God always finishes what he starts, I'm glad one of us does.

I robbed a man the other day

So, a friend of mine and I were doing security for a car show here in
Moose Jaw this past weekend when something interesting happened. It
was late, after midnight I believe and we were out roaming the parking
lot ensuring no locals were out shopping for after hours hood
ornaments. We had just turned the cornet past the last row of cars,
just past the 1944 Rolls Royce I see a man sitting on the  bench where
we put our stuff. I watched as he began to go through our bags. So I
called my friend over and we began to make small talk with the man
circa few minutes before taking off to do another round of the parking
lot. We walked approximately 100 feet before turning around, and he
was gone. Along with our stuff.  I couldn't help but laugh because
really our stuff was just food and some drinks no big deal.

As we continued to walk I was accosted by that still small voice that
can only be compared to when your mom uses your middle name because
she knows.

"what did he lose?"

huh? (as you can see, I'm pretty quick)

"what did he lose?"

hmmm well I don't suppose he'll Lose any sleep that's for sure.

"what did you take from him?"

Cue the defense mechanisms.
What? What did I take? I just gave my food supply to a man named
thief, so I wasn't sure where this is going.

"what did you steal from him?"

Uh oh. This is the point I began to think about it.  Did I in fact rob
this man?

"Dignity"

what?

"you took his dignity from him."

oh.

By not freely giving away that which i had in abundance I stripped
away his dignity. How easy would or should have been to just give him,
or share with him. Instead of showing him a simple act of kindness

I walked away.

By sharing with him I could have shown him Jesus if only for that
moment. By denying him this I made him steal what should gave been
freely given. Mercy would have broken a cycle that night but I chose
not to. Had I been keeping in step with the spirit that situation
would have been radically different. What was stolen should have been
given. Because I did not give I became the thief. I denied him not
only bread, but also a chance to engage with the bread of life. In
that moment, I denied Jesus.

Walking like Christ isn't easy, but it is good.
 God didn't disown me, but he confronted and reminded me that he loves
that man and desperately wants to reconcile him to himself.

Everyday I try and walk a little more like Jesus. Sometimes I get it
and some dats I don't. Yet God remains faithful and he always finishes
the good works he starts in us.

in his foosteps.

Never dull, life is always interesting. The constant change exprienced in our daily lives can often overwhelm our senses, confusing them. We or to be more particular I, often have a difficult time differentiating the profound from the profane. I fill my mind with words spoken from the word and from others who share similar passions as myself. Yet words they remain. Just empty vessels that fail to transfom the reader. I strive for that intinimate relationship with the Lord that David had, that Brother Andrew shared, to practice the prescence of the Lord as Brother Lawerence did. Yet the Scripture that rings true is found in Matthew 7 verse 13

But small is the gate, and narrow is the path that leads to life, and few will find it.

Knowing that this passage commonly refers to eternity, yet wondering if it does not speak also to the abundant life promised to those who walk like Christ? Or perhaps it is one and the same. I don't know.

Here's what I do know that i want to follow Jesus Christ, love his bride, and to walk as Christ walked. I also know, I'm not very good at it. I know, that I can't do it on my own and when I try (because I undoubtably will) and fall on my face, God will be right beside me to pick me up.

I don't want to get consumed by the media driven, self consuming society we pawn off as our culture. I want to be in the world, but sold out and spirit filled. But the question is how? It's not like there's an equation you could follow or a recipe. But then, who really wants to follow an equation or a recipe. Wouldn't you rather follow a man, a revolutionary. Or is our Jesus no longer radical, but a mild mannered evangelical who we can encounter within the confines of our stale sunday morning routine. I hope not, because if it is, we may find out it wasn't Jesus we are following, but an insufficient caricature of ourselves.