What do you picture when you hear these words? What do you envision? A homeless man strewn along the sidewalk, rags barely covering his filth stained body? A man trapped by the images he sees on a computer screen? Perhaps a woman,whose arms are shredded with track marks, and face littered with signs of abuse? All of these associations would be accurate visual reactions to the words above; however, these are not what I had in mind.
Ever increasingly these words remind me of Grace. For a long time, when I heard the word grace, it was a clean and shiny concept often accompanied by it's equally smooth and appeasing friend Forgiveness. I thought Grace and Forgiveness to be like spiritual crutches, holding me up despite my weaknesses. I thought by grace God would change my flaws and redeem my inequities. I thought grace was freely given and received. I thought grace existed to free me from my struggles with my own sinfulness. I essentially viewed it as an escape clause for life. I cannot overcome something, oh well that's where grace comes in. I continue to disobey God's law, oh, well there's grace.
I was not alone in this thinking, various people would tell me as I shared my struggles with them, just accept God's grace, walk in it and he will change these things. However, the more time i spend thinking about it, the more I realize that Grace doesn't exist to change my circumstances, it exists to change me. And it's a lot more uncomfortable than I originally thought.
Grace allows me the strength through Christ to challenge my circumstances and overcome them.
Romans 5:3-5
because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
This is a process of Grace and suffering appears to be the cornerstone of this growth.
Grace is Dirty: because the people who need it the most are often unclean, phsyically, emotionally and spiritually. James teaches us not to show favor based on appearances, Christ ministered alone to a Samaritan woman who was surely unclean.
Grace is Dark: because we often don't understand it. It's often more complex than our sitcom-esq expectations. There are often loose ends and brokenness that remains, but hope remains. Christ, as he cast the demons of Legion, he let them go into the pigs instead of banishing them, why?
Grace is Painful: the ultimate expression of Grace is the crucifixion. Cross seems to be a much more pleasant word, we think redemption, savior, freedom. Crucifixion captures the reality, the cost of Grace. Christ endured torture, was beaten beyond recognition, and nailed to pieces of wood. This is Grace. Much different than my original concept of grace.
Grace is Costly: If the ultimate example of grace cost Christ his life, how could I, could we expect grace to cost us nothing? Often our grace is without consequence or repercussion. This grace is often both cheap and insufficient, and further, i believe unappealing to the world.
Grace is Complex: Starving children, the homeless, widows, orphans, the poor,friends, family and neighbors. It is pretty easy to be graceful to them, as it should be, after all it's our biblical mandate to look after them. What about the sexual predator, what about the serial killer or rapist, are these less deserving of God's Grace? Why is it, as Phillip Yancy says in his book "what's so amazing about grace" as he quotes a friend of his, "is it easier for a homosexual to get sex off the street, than a hug in church?"
When Christ ministered to the lepers, he touched them, they had an encounter with Grace. This was more than social justice at work, more than Christ touching the untouchables, although it was that too, it was Christ showing that there are no untouchables. By sacrificing his life, he taught us the cost of Grace, by touching the lepers, he taught us the boundary defying reality of Grace. By touching the leper, Christ shows that there is nothing to beyond his touch, nor should there be of ours.
Grace is dirty, Grace is dark, Grace is costly, but it is sufficient.
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