Through a stained glass window

One of the hardest things for me, as a follower of Jesus the Christ is
to be transparent. My natural, default setting is put up walls. I
worked hard my whole life at keeping people out, or at the very least
at a safe distance.

I juxtaposed this with my verbal proclaimation that I was in fact a
Christ follower. I kept everything in darkness even though Christ
compells us to the light.

I became adept at superficial forms of intimacy, I knew how to care
deeply for others but often refused them that same privilege.
Relationally I could and often was described as emotionally
unavailable. I would deny people transparency and justify it by saying
I'm merely comfortable with silence.

Then Jesus came along and wrecked everything.

He knocked over my house of cards with a simple question.

If you don't let people see you, how will they see me?

And with that the cards began to flutter to the floor.

Now the cool thing about Jesus is, he doesn't destroy our paradigms
and leave us with nothing, instead he restores them.

You see, if you were to spend your whole life, all your savings, sold
everything you had to build an art gallery and bring in exquisite and
beautiful prices. Would you then spend as much effort as possible
boarding up windows and bricking the door shut, and continue to tell
people about your wonderful gallery?

Sometimes this is what we do with Jesus. We keep him inside our/my
bricked up houses with stainglass windows(see how I tied that in
there, pretty clever) that may look really good, but no one knows
what's going on inside.

Jesus showed me that's what I was doing. He also reccommeded that I
stop. I figured what the heck, I'm not the carpenter here.

Matthew 5:14

14"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be
hidden. 15Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.
Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in
the house. 16In the same way, let your light shine before men, that
they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven

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How are you?

A common enough phrase is it not. In fact if I were a betting man, i would suspect that 93.827 of all conversations begin with some form of this inquiry. These oft understated words are actually farore significant perhaps than we realize.
It is in the moments immeaditely following these words that define not only the rest of the conversation but also reveals several other things as well.
For instance during those few seconds we quickly evaluate several things, such as:

How honest do I feel like being?

Do I trust them?

Do I even like them?

Do they still smell funny?

Do they really want to know?

How we respond defines our transparency for the rest of the conversation. Many of us deflect (guilty) we respond sometimes curtly and almost always briely with a word or two.

I'm fine. Or everythings great.

I know I do this all the time. Sometimes we even need to do it, certain situations dictate us to limit our transparency. Many times however I do it to keep people away. God on his never leaving, never forsaking kind if way reminds me, showse that transparency is critical to my faith. The Holy Spirit often needs to push me reminding my life is God's andy grasp on it has been forefit since the cross.

Galatians 6.2 We are exhorted to help bear each others burdens.

In our culture autonomy(a fancy way of saying our desire to do things our own way and not to be confused with anatomy) is incredibly important. We value independance, it is seen as being strong, While asking for help is a sign of weakness.

This is not the way Jesus had planned for us. It's a tactic of the enemy, to separate us from the body of Christ, convincing us we would fare better on our own, that no one would understand, or that some how the loads we carry are toxic and we had better keep it inside less we infect others as well.

God continues to challenge me in this way and i find it quite scary. But it is something I need to do and fortunately God always finishes what he starts, I'm glad one of us does.

I robbed a man the other day

So, a friend of mine and I were doing security for a car show here in
Moose Jaw this past weekend when something interesting happened. It
was late, after midnight I believe and we were out roaming the parking
lot ensuring no locals were out shopping for after hours hood
ornaments. We had just turned the cornet past the last row of cars,
just past the 1944 Rolls Royce I see a man sitting on the  bench where
we put our stuff. I watched as he began to go through our bags. So I
called my friend over and we began to make small talk with the man
circa few minutes before taking off to do another round of the parking
lot. We walked approximately 100 feet before turning around, and he
was gone. Along with our stuff.  I couldn't help but laugh because
really our stuff was just food and some drinks no big deal.

As we continued to walk I was accosted by that still small voice that
can only be compared to when your mom uses your middle name because
she knows.

"what did he lose?"

huh? (as you can see, I'm pretty quick)

"what did he lose?"

hmmm well I don't suppose he'll Lose any sleep that's for sure.

"what did you take from him?"

Cue the defense mechanisms.
What? What did I take? I just gave my food supply to a man named
thief, so I wasn't sure where this is going.

"what did you steal from him?"

Uh oh. This is the point I began to think about it.  Did I in fact rob
this man?

"Dignity"

what?

"you took his dignity from him."

oh.

By not freely giving away that which i had in abundance I stripped
away his dignity. How easy would or should have been to just give him,
or share with him. Instead of showing him a simple act of kindness

I walked away.

By sharing with him I could have shown him Jesus if only for that
moment. By denying him this I made him steal what should gave been
freely given. Mercy would have broken a cycle that night but I chose
not to. Had I been keeping in step with the spirit that situation
would have been radically different. What was stolen should have been
given. Because I did not give I became the thief. I denied him not
only bread, but also a chance to engage with the bread of life. In
that moment, I denied Jesus.

Walking like Christ isn't easy, but it is good.
 God didn't disown me, but he confronted and reminded me that he loves
that man and desperately wants to reconcile him to himself.

Everyday I try and walk a little more like Jesus. Sometimes I get it
and some dats I don't. Yet God remains faithful and he always finishes
the good works he starts in us.

in his foosteps.

Never dull, life is always interesting. The constant change exprienced in our daily lives can often overwhelm our senses, confusing them. We or to be more particular I, often have a difficult time differentiating the profound from the profane. I fill my mind with words spoken from the word and from others who share similar passions as myself. Yet words they remain. Just empty vessels that fail to transfom the reader. I strive for that intinimate relationship with the Lord that David had, that Brother Andrew shared, to practice the prescence of the Lord as Brother Lawerence did. Yet the Scripture that rings true is found in Matthew 7 verse 13

But small is the gate, and narrow is the path that leads to life, and few will find it.

Knowing that this passage commonly refers to eternity, yet wondering if it does not speak also to the abundant life promised to those who walk like Christ? Or perhaps it is one and the same. I don't know.

Here's what I do know that i want to follow Jesus Christ, love his bride, and to walk as Christ walked. I also know, I'm not very good at it. I know, that I can't do it on my own and when I try (because I undoubtably will) and fall on my face, God will be right beside me to pick me up.

I don't want to get consumed by the media driven, self consuming society we pawn off as our culture. I want to be in the world, but sold out and spirit filled. But the question is how? It's not like there's an equation you could follow or a recipe. But then, who really wants to follow an equation or a recipe. Wouldn't you rather follow a man, a revolutionary. Or is our Jesus no longer radical, but a mild mannered evangelical who we can encounter within the confines of our stale sunday morning routine. I hope not, because if it is, we may find out it wasn't Jesus we are following, but an insufficient caricature of ourselves.

This week.....

I felt challenged again. Reminded may actually be more accurate. God in his grace, reminded me that my life, was really his. But what does that really mean? To me? To anyone? For me, it meant something pretty significant. It meant that my life was God's. All of it. The good, the bad, the mountains and the valley's. All his. The days where I look good, the days where I am a mess are His too. The seasons of freedom, where I am an overcomer, and the times where I find myself wallowing in the trough with the pigs, much like the prodigal son, those days belong to Him. From the times i spent playing soccer back to the times where I spent my nights alone. His. Every time i was strong, His, every time I was weak, I was hurt, they belong to him too. Jesus paid for my life on the cross, bore the shame and punishment of my sin. So I would not have to. But I did anyways. For 20 years. Ever since I was six, I began collecting. Every thoughtless insult, every putdown, everytime I was overlooked or ignored, both real and imagined. I kept them. Everytime my father forgot to call, everytime I was ignored by parents. I wrapped my fingers around them as if i could stop them by shapinig them if i just held on. Growing up without a father. That was mine. Not having a relationship with my mom, i carried that too. I felt that I had broad shoulders so i could carry more, so I did. I picked up every bit of baggage the enemy laid at my feet. Guilt, shame, fear, insecurity. I kept it all. Every hurtful memory kept those too.

Then God moved

He reminded me that all of those things were his. Paid for by the blood of his Son. Purchased. I was left with redemption, while he bore my shame.

"Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke it is easy, and my burden is light." Matthew 11.28-30

In that moment I realized the burden I have been carrying, was not mine. All these years I've let the chains of slavery remain, because I had forgotten that

It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery Gal 5.1

I realize now the cost of my sin. I've lost many friendships because I was holding on so tightly to the hurt from my past. I've ruined friendships, relationships because i refused to let people in. Because I didn't want them to see my shame, my weakness. I had come to believe I was toxic, and I thought naively that I could do this on my own. Are there more crippling words than that? That's exactly what Satan does, divide and conquer. Seperate us from the community of faith, and wear us down with lies.

In that moment, it was like Christ had showed me a picture, of Him standing in front of me. It is his body that is scarred. Those wounds belong to him too. The chains, he lifted them off ages ago, all i had to do was let go.

It is for freedom he has set me free.

Amen.

To be set apart.

1 Peter 1:14-15 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written "Be holy, because I am holy"

Holiness. It means to be set apart for the service of God. It means that what is called for holiness should not be used for the profane.

Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

How many times do we justify our actions with the words "it is ok, because I can handle it" A violent movie? No problem, I can filter out the bad stuff. A song that glorifies the flesh? It doesn't have any effect on me.

As followers of Jesus Christ we are called out of darkness and into the light (1 peter 2:9)

As we decide to follow Christ, we must embrace the truth found in 2 Cor 5:17 where it is written "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ they are a new creation. The old is gone and the new has come.

So, when we turn to follow Christ, there is a necessary change that must occur in our lives. The old must go. The new must come. Romans 6:11 We must consider ourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Jesus Christ.

In our culture, it seems that we genuinely want to come to Christ, but we tend to also want to take as much of the world with us as possible. Even though we are called to to no longer conform. We do not need to see evil to renounce it. We do not need to look the world to save it.

When we do this, we are living in error. The moment we try and please both the Spirit and the flesh, the flesh wins. The Bible teaches us that a little yeast will work its way through the whole batch of dough. Such it is with the world. We can't live a little for the world and a little for Jesus, scripture also teaches that we cannot serve two masters, we will love one, while we hate the other.

By the grace of God, we are not only being called away from the world, but it is equally a call to something. It is an invitation to draw nearer to Christ. As we remove ourselves from the patterns of the world through Christ living in us, we draw nearer to the Father. As we do this, we begin to live by the spirit, to keep in step with the spirit!

So, what does it look like, to be set apart for use by God? It could look like me turning off facebook and spending more time in prayer, interceding for believers persecuted for following Christ. It could mean applying the word of God as a filter to what media I allow myself to partake in. It may mean fasting from media altogether, from watching sports (ouch), from eating out all the time and giving that money away instead. It should mean praying that the Holy Spirit will guide you in what the Lord wants you to do.

Remember relying on God is a daily choice, a daily struggle. If we truly want to live by the spirit, and put to death our flesh, our sinful nature, then we must be disciplined in mind, and in spirit to do this.

We can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.

Phillipians 4:13

Out of Abundance

We give out of abundance. What we have plenty of we are more willing to give away. If we were to have two copies of the same film, we would likely have no issue giving that copy away to a friend. If we ever cook to much for ourselves or our families, many of us are quick to jump on the phone and see if we can fill a few more spots at the table. Since we have in abundance we also tend to give that which we have much of. Sometimes, even though we are willing, people do not always accept a gift that is free. In Britain, a price comparison company was attempting to give away 5 pound notes. The gentlemen in the above picture stood on two of the busier streets, encountered over 1800 people and only 28 people took the free money. Mind you they had to ask for it, which is probably a significant reason why most didn't. We are ok with giving out of abundance, we are less ok with asking out of need.

However, I believe we all give out of abundance. In Luke 6:45 we are told that out of the abundance of the heart our mouth speaks. So whether your are preaching from a pulpit, teaching seminars to business people, teaching children, or sitting around having coffee with friends, as you are talking, you are giving out of abundance. The question is, what is it that you have in abundance. When a lame man asked Peter and James for some alms, this is what they said "Silver and gold I have none, but what I do have, I give to you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, rise up and walk." Acts 3:6. The disciples had abundance of faith, so they gave away a blessing worth much more than a hot meal or shelter. It would have been easier to give him money, but that did not have an abundance of money but of the Spirit. Do we have an abundance of the spirit? When we speak, and we encouraging each other, or are we more concerned with proving a point, or gossiping, or foolish talk?

So,I say live by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature, for the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other so you do not do what you want. Galatians 5.16-18